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Most of us have found ourselves in situations where we feel totally overwhelmed\u2014really upset, stressed, frustrated, or even so overcome with emotion that we feel unable to make a decision or move forward.<\/span><\/p>\n Maybe it was a conflict with a friend or family member, a challenging task at work, a mistake that impacted our child, or just <\/span>one of those days<\/span><\/i> where lots of little things went wrong, over and over. Whatever the reason, it felt like too much to handle.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Enter:<\/span> distress tolerance<\/b>.<\/span><\/p>\n A five-dollar phrase, maybe, but a simple set of <\/span>really useful<\/span><\/i> skills.<\/span><\/p>\n What is distress tolerance, anyway?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Glad you asked!<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance is the ability to manage and cope with emotional discomfort or pain without losing your cool or experiencing significant overwhelm.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n You can think of it as mental and emotional resilience. Just like a ship is built to withstand a storm, distress tolerance is the ability you\u2019ve cultivated to navigate through life\u2019s challenges\u2026 <\/span>without<\/span><\/i> sinking.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n This ability is vital for maintaining mental health and well-being. When we can adequately tolerate distress, we can handle situations more effectively, build healthier relationships, and lead happier lives.<\/span><\/p>\n Let\u2019s dig in a little deeper to the concept of distress tolerance. Sure, it\u2019s an emotional buffer of sorts\u2014but how can it <\/span>really<\/span><\/i> benefit us?<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance is about handling tough emotions like anger, sadness, or anxiety\u2026 Without letting them control us.<\/span><\/p>\n Imagine a seesaw. On one side, you’ve got the emotions, and on the other side, you’ve got your actions. The goal is to keep them balanced. We’re not trying to squash or ignore our emotions (let’s be real\u2014that rarely works in the long run), but we also don’t want to let them dictate our behavior.<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance and emotional regulation are related, but they aren\u2019t the same. Emotional regulation is like turning a volume knob to adjust your emotions\u2014to make them louder or quieter, based on the situation. But distress tolerance is about handling the discomfort and staying calm even when our emotions are blaring through the speakers.<\/span><\/p>\n Let’s be clear: developing distress tolerance isn’t about pretending everything’s fine when it’s not. We\u2019re not looking to deny or feel shame around our emotions. But there\u2019s value in accepting that life will throw us curveballs along the way and building our resilience so that we can make the best decisions possible in the face of those things.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n In short, distress tolerance is an invaluable skill for managing life’s ups and downs. It helps us keep cool under pressure, rebound after setbacks, and get through challenging situations without losing our way.<\/span><\/p>\n How do we build distress tolerance skills when we need them?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n We can focus on these four foundational distress tolerance concepts:<\/span><\/p>\n At first glance, <\/span>distraction<\/b> might seem like a bad thing\u2014after all, don\u2019t we want to confront the source of our distress? But distraction, in this context, doesn\u2019t mean burying our head in the sand or denying how we feel. It simply means giving ourselves the time and space to clear our minds and reduce the intensity of our stress.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Whether it\u2019s reading a book, watching a movie, or engaging in a yoga session, it can be valuable to shift our focus when things get tough and let our nervous system calm down before doing anything else.<\/span><\/p>\n How would you address a friend in distress? Probably with a lot more kindness than you\u2019d typically show yourself, right?<\/span><\/p>\n The idea of self-soothing means applying that same kindness to ourselves. You can listen to your favorite music, enjoy a cup of tea, take a relaxing bath, or spend time outdoors or with loved ones. Do whatever you need to feel calm and nurtured.<\/span><\/p>\n IMPROVE the moment refers to a specific set of skills or actions that can lessen your immediate stress. The acronym stands for:<\/span><\/p>\n These strategies won\u2019t make your problems go away, but they can help bring them into perspective\u2014and bring <\/span>you<\/span><\/i> back to yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n Accepting the situation you\u2019re in doesn\u2019t mean you have to like it. In fact, it\u2019s better if you know you don\u2019t. After all, denying our emotions isn\u2019t a sustainable strategy, right?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n But accepting the reality of the moment can help us avoid a lot of painful struggling\u2014and it can help us move on to solutions or next steps even faster.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance doesn\u2019t simply get us through the rough times\u2014it helps us <\/span>thrive<\/span><\/i>, despite them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n When we can handle distress, as not-fun as it might be, we\u2019re less likely to react impulsively or make decisions we\u2019ll later wish we hadn\u2019t. We can stay calm and level-headed, even when things are difficult. This can help us maintain healthy relationships, too\u2026 We\u2019ve all experienced the impact of things said in the heat of the moment, haven\u2019t we?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance is also linked to better mental health, overall. It can help reduce anxiety, lessen our risk for depression, and even help us avoid other mental health struggles. By learning to navigate our emotions instead of being at their mercy, we can build resilience and enjoy a better quality of life.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Distress tolerance is a set of skills that can be built from the ground up\u2014that\u2019s the good news. Anyone can start from anywhere\u2026 No matter how you\u2019ve dealt with struggle in the past.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Mindfulness plays a large role here. We can use these techniques to release ourselves from the regrets of the past and the anxieties of the future by staying present and charting a brand new course for ourselves, moment by mindful moment!<\/span><\/p>\n Pay attention to self-care, including the nourishment and movement your body needs to stay physically healthy.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n And don\u2019t be afraid to seek guidance and support from a qualified mental health professional. Therapists are trained in these skills and can be there to help as you learn to navigate our emotions.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Most of us have found ourselves in situations where we feel totally overwhelmed\u2014really upset, stressed, frustrated, or even so overcome with emotion that we feel unable to make a decision or move forward. Maybe it was a conflict with a friend or family member, a challenging task at work, a mistake that impacted our child, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhat Is Distress Tolerance?<\/span><\/h2>\n
Okay, But\u2026 What is Distress Tolerance, <\/span>Really?<\/span><\/i><\/h2>\n
Building Distress Tolerance Skills<\/span><\/h2>\n
Distraction<\/span><\/h3>\n
Self-Soothing<\/span><\/h3>\n
IMPROVE the Moment<\/span><\/h3>\n
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Radical Acceptance<\/span><\/h3>\n
The Benefits of Developing Distress Tolerance Skills<\/span><\/h2>\n
Distress Tolerance Skills Can be Built from the Ground Up<\/span><\/h2>\n